Counselling and a place to talk
A private place to speak honestly without protecting anyone else, minimising what you feel or explaining why the death still matters.
Long after a death
Support as life continues after a death.
The funeral may be over, but grief, decisions and change can continue for a long time.
The Death Guide offers counselling, family support and practical assistance whether the death was recent or many years ago. You do not need to know what kind of help to ask for before making contact.
There is no single way to grieve
Grief does not follow one timetable.
Grief can be intense, quiet, delayed, changeable or difficult to name. It may bring sadness, longing, anger, guilt, relief, numbness, anxiety or confusion. You may also laugh, enjoy something or have periods when grief feels further away.
It can affect sleep, appetite, energy, concentration, memory, confidence, relationships and your sense of who you are. A difficult day does not mean you have gone backwards, and there is no required date by which you should be “over it.”
Family and relationship support
Help when people are grieving differently, communication has become difficult or decisions need careful discussion.
Practical help
Support to organise information, break down overwhelming tasks and prepare for conversations with other professionals.
Remembrance and continuing bonds
Help with memorials, ashes, writing, photographs, video tributes and meaningful ways to remember someone.
Counselling and guidance
A place to speak honestly about what has changed.
Family and friends may be deeply supportive. They may also be grieving, have their own ideas about what should happen or simply not know what to say.
Damien can support individuals, families and groups with:
- Sadness, anger, guilt, regret, relief or unanswered questions.
- The loss of a partner, parent, child, sibling, friend, colleague or another important person.
- The end of a caring role and the changes that follow it.
- A difficult or complicated relationship with the person who died.
- Changes in identity, purpose, family life or future plans.
- Anniversaries, holidays and significant events.
- Deciding how to approach a task, conversation or memorial.
Support may involve one focused conversation or a series of appointments agreed over time. It can take place in person, by phone or video call, depending on what is appropriate and comfortable.
Explore counselling and guidanceSudden, traumatic or suicide bereavement
When a death brings additional shock and uncertainty.
A death that was sudden, violent, accidental or otherwise traumatic can bring additional layers of shock. There may have been no opportunity to prepare or say goodbye, and police, the Coroner, emergency services, workplaces, media or other unfamiliar systems may be involved.
When someone has died by suicide, the people affected may also face stigma, blame, guilt and repeated questions. The impact can reach relatives, friends, witnesses, first responders, colleagues and whole communities.
Damien has experience supporting people through grief, suicide and trauma. Support may include:
- A safe place to speak about what happened and what has followed.
- Help managing overwhelming information and practical demands.
- Preparing questions for police, coronial staff or other professionals.
- Supporting communication within a family, workplace or community.
- Recognising when trauma-specific or clinical care may also be appropriate.
Voluntary assisted dying
Knowing a death is planned does not make grief simple.
Bereavement after voluntary assisted dying may include sorrow, relief, certainty, doubt, gratitude, disagreement or isolation. Different responses can exist within the same person or family.
The Death Guide offers respectful, non-directive support before and after a voluntary assisted death. This may include individual counselling, family conversations, carer support and help with funeral, memorial or legacy decisions.
Damien does not judge the decision or try to direct how a person or family should understand it.
Families and changed roles
People can love the same person and grieve very differently.
One person may want to talk while another becomes quiet. Someone may focus on practical tasks while somebody else struggles to make decisions. Roles, responsibilities and relationships can all change after a death.
Damien can help slow difficult conversations down, identify what matters to each person, clarify information and look for workable next steps through individual support, family meetings, advocacy or facilitated conversations.
Where legal advice, formal dispute resolution, family-violence support or another specialist service is required, Damien can help identify the appropriate pathway.
Explore advocacy and family supportChildren and young people
Questions and grief can return as a child grows.
Children and young people may move in and out of grief, ask the same questions more than once or revisit the death as they understand more. Grief may appear through play, behaviour, physical complaints, changes at school, sleep difficulties, withdrawal or strong emotions.
Damien regularly works with children and families around death and grief. Support is shaped around the child's age, understanding, personality and circumstances.
- Speaking honestly in language the child can understand.
- Responding to questions without giving more detail than is helpful.
- Preparing for a funeral, memorial or significant anniversary.
- Maintaining reassurance, connection and reliable routines.
- Considering what may help the child's school or other trusted adults.
- Recognising when specialist child-bereavement or mental-health support may be appropriate.
Support may involve working directly with a child, helping a parent or carer prepare for conversations, or meeting with the family together.
The practical weight that remains
Even a straightforward task can feel enormous.
Grief often arrives with paperwork, decisions and responsibilities that cannot all be completed at once. There may be organisations to notify, documents to locate, accounts to address, appointments to arrange, possessions to sort and questions about an estate.
Practical support may include:
- Turning an overwhelming list into manageable next steps.
- Keeping track of notifications, documents and unanswered questions.
- Preparing for conversations with solicitors, financial advisers, government services or other professionals.
- Organising photographs, personal papers or digital material.
- Supporting decisions about belongings at a manageable pace.
- Writing or proofreading acknowledgements, notices or memorial material.
- Planning a later gathering, tribute or commemoration.
- Coordinating agreed tasks when several people or services are involved.
Damien can provide organisation, writing and practical assistance, but does not provide legal, probate, taxation or financial advice. Where specialist advice is needed, he can help you prepare questions for the appropriate professional.
Remembrance and continuing bonds
Remembering someone does not end with the funeral.
People often continue their connection with the person who died through stories, photographs, objects, music, places, cultural or spiritual practices, private rituals and the ways they choose to live.
There is no deadline for deciding what remembrance should look like. A memorial, scattering of ashes or family gathering can happen weeks, months or years later. It can be public or private, formal or simple.
- Planning a memorial, anniversary gathering or private ceremony.
- Considering meaningful options for ashes.
- Writing a tribute, speech, reading or commemorative notice.
- Designing a printed keepsake or order of service.
- Gathering photographs and creating a video tribute.
- Planning music, readings and personal details.
- Coordinating the event and the people involved.
Within Macquarie Valley Funerals' service area, funeral and related services involving Damien are provided through his role as General Manager of Macquarie Valley Funerals and Monuments. Elsewhere, The Death Guide may provide independent writing, planning, memorial and practical support alongside the family's chosen funeral director and other professionals.
Returning to everyday life
The world may resume before you feel ready.
Returning to work, caring for children, managing a home, attending social occasions or making future plans can feel unfamiliar. The quiet after people stop checking in may be harder than the first busy weeks.
Birthdays, anniversaries, holidays, songs, places and family milestones can bring grief close again. A new relationship, a birth, a wedding, an illness or another death may also change how an earlier loss is experienced.
- Prepare for returning to work or a difficult social situation.
- Decide what you want other people to know.
- Plan for an anniversary or significant day.
- Respond to grief that has returned or changed over time.
- Find a way of remembering that belongs to you.
Renewed grief does not mean you have failed or gone backwards. The person and the relationship remain part of your life.
How Damien can help
Support shaped around the person, family and circumstances.
You might want one conversation, practical help with a task, support for a family discussion or somewhere to return by agreement over time.
Individual counselling
A private space to talk about grief, loss, trauma, relationships, identity and the changes that follow a death.
Support after a caring role
Help adjusting after a long illness or caring role and finding a way into a different daily life.
Family conversations
Support when people are grieving differently or decisions about remembrance, belongings or responsibilities need discussion.
Complex bereavement
Informed support after sudden, traumatic or suicide death, or bereavement connected with voluntary assisted dying.
Practical guidance
Help breaking tasks down, keeping track of information and coordinating agreed practical work.
Writing, design and tributes
Eulogies, memorial writing, notices, printed materials, photograph preparation and video tributes.
Memorial and event support
Planning and coordinating memorials, anniversary gatherings, ash-scattering ceremonies and other events.
Finding the right service
Help identifying when specialist bereavement, clinical, legal, financial or community support is required.
If urgent help is needed
The Death Guide is not an emergency or 24-hour crisis service.
If life is in danger, someone may act on thoughts of suicide or urgent medical assistance is needed, call Triple Zero (000).
You can begin wherever you are
You do not need to decide what to call the help first.
Tell Damien what has happened and what feels most difficult now. Together, you can consider what kind of emotional, practical or specialist support may help.
Telephone enquiries: 10am–3pm Monday–Friday. Email enquiries may be sent at any time. Appointments may be available outside telephone hours by arrangement.