The Death Guide is not an emergency or crisis service.

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Before death

Support and preparation before a death.

You do not have to wait until someone is dying or a crisis has begun to ask for help.

The Death Guide can support you while life is going well, after a diagnosis, during palliative care, while caring for someone, or whenever you feel ready to think and talk about what may lie ahead.

Talk with Damien Explore ways I can help

Why begin now?

There are many reasons to begin before a crisis.

Planning before a death is not about predicting or controlling everything. It creates space for honest conversations, helps you understand the available choices, records what matters and can make the practical and emotional load lighter for everyone involved.

  • You are healthy and want to put your wishes in order.
  • You or someone close to you has received a serious diagnosis.
  • You are caring for someone whose health is changing.
  • Palliative care has been discussed or has begun.
  • You are considering or affected by voluntary assisted dying.
  • You are already grieving what may be coming.
  • Your family finds it difficult to talk about death.
  • You want to record funeral or memorial wishes.
  • You need help organising information, documents or practical details.

You do not need to arrive with a completed plan or know precisely which service to request. A conversation can begin with what is happening, what matters and what currently feels difficult.

End-of-life planning

Planning that begins with the person.

Good planning is not only about forms. It begins with the person's values, relationships, beliefs, worries and hopes.

What matters most if health or independence changes?

Who should be involved in conversations and decisions?

Where would you prefer to be cared for, if circumstances allow?

What treatments, experiences or outcomes feel acceptable or unacceptable?

Are there cultural, spiritual or personal practices others should understand?

What would make the time ahead feel more like your own?

Support may involve one focused planning session, several conversations over time, a family meeting, help preparing questions for health professionals or practical assistance organising and recording decisions already made.

NSW information

Advance care planning and Advance Care Directives.

Advance care planning is the process of considering and communicating what you would want if illness or injury left you unable to speak for yourself.

An Advance Care Directive records your preferences for future healthcare and treatment. In NSW, it can only be made by an adult who has decision-making capacity. It must reflect that person's own wishes; somebody else cannot make one for them after capacity has been lost.

The Death Guide can help you understand the planning process, think through your values and priorities, prepare for conversations with family and health professionals, work through the NSW materials, put your thoughts into clear language and organise who needs copies.

Important: Damien does not provide medical or legal advice. Treatment questions should be discussed with your GP or treating team, and legal questions with an appropriately qualified legal service. The Death Guide can help you prepare for those conversations and manage the practical steps around them.

NSW Health: Advance Care Planning ↗ NSW Advance Care Directive form and booklet ↗

Talking together

Starting conversations families often avoid.

Many people want to talk about death but do not know how to begin. Others worry that raising the subject will seem pessimistic, frightening or disrespectful.

The Death Guide can help individuals and families begin these conversations gently and constructively.

  • Work out what you want to say before speaking with family.
  • Help family members understand a person's wishes.
  • Facilitate a family meeting.
  • Make room for different beliefs and emotional responses.
  • Support conversations with children or younger family members.
  • Clarify what has been decided and what remains uncertain.
  • Help people communicate when fear, conflict or old family patterns get in the way.

The purpose is not to make everyone feel the same way. It is to help people listen, understand what matters and find a workable path through the decisions ahead.

Living with serious illness

Palliative care support.

Palliative care focuses on quality of life for a person living with a serious, life-limiting or terminal illness. It can begin well before the final days of life, may be provided alongside active treatment, and can also support families and carers.

The Death Guide does not replace doctors, nurses, allied health professionals or other members of the palliative-care team. Damien can provide an additional layer of practical and emotional support around that care.

  • Prepare questions for appointments.
  • Help express wishes and concerns.
  • Prepare for family meetings.
  • Liaise with services with your permission.
  • Discuss care, funeral and memorial preferences.
  • Support carers and family members.
Healthdirect: Palliative care ↗

Non-directive support

Voluntary assisted dying.

Voluntary assisted dying is available in NSW for eligible people through a formal legal and medical process. It can bring complex practical, emotional, family, cultural and spiritual questions for the person considering it and the people around them.

The Death Guide can provide independent, non-directive support without trying to influence the decision. This may include space to discuss thoughts and fears, help preparing for conversations, family and carer support, practical preparation, and planning funeral, memorial and legacy wishes.

Damien does not assess eligibility, provide medical advice or replace the authorised health professionals responsible for the process.

NSW Health: Voluntary assisted dying ↗ NSW Care Navigator: 1300 802 133

Emotional support before death

Grief can begin long before a person dies.

You may be grieving a diagnosis, changing roles, lost independence, a different future or gradual changes in someone you love. Anticipatory grief does not mean you have given up. It is a response to living with change and knowing that further loss may be coming.

Anticipatory grief support

Counselling and guidance can create room to speak honestly, recognise what is already being lost and remain connected to the life that is still being lived.

Support for carers

A confidential place to speak, help organising what is happening, preparing for appointments and family conversations, making practical plans and considering respite and other support.

What matters to you

Funeral wishes, memories and practical preparation.

Planning a funeral does not require choosing every detail or producing rigid instructions. It can simply mean recording what matters and making it easier for others to understand your preferences.

  • Burial, cremation and other choices.
  • The kind of funeral, memorial or gathering that feels appropriate.
  • People you would like involved, music, readings, rituals and personal elements.
  • Ideas for a eulogy, photographs, video tributes and life-story materials.
  • The tone you would like—and anything you do not want.
  • How your wishes can be recorded and shared.

Preparation can also include recording stories, organising photographs, writing letters, gathering material for a future eulogy or tribute, considering meaningful belongings, organising digital information and leaving practical notes.

Within Macquarie Valley Funerals' service area, funeral arrangements and related funeral services involving Damien are provided through Macquarie Valley Funerals. Elsewhere, The Death Guide may provide independent planning, writing, coordination and practical assistance while working alongside a family's chosen funeral director and other professionals.

How Damien can help

Support shaped around your circumstances.

There is no single package that suits every person or family. Support may be available in person across the Central West and greater NSW, or remotely where appropriate.

A planning conversation

A focused session to discuss what is happening, identify priorities and work out the next practical steps.

Ongoing counselling and guidance

Continuing emotional and practical support through illness, caring, uncertainty and anticipatory grief.

Writing and practical assistance

Help recording wishes, organising information, preparing questions, developing funeral ideas and gathering life-story material.

Companionship and presence

Support for the person who is ill and those caring for them, including companionship and vigil planning as circumstances change.

Legacy and personal preparation

Help recording stories or messages, organising photographs and personal information, and developing letters, tributes or other meaningful legacy projects.

Begin with a few words

You do not need to have the right words.

You may know exactly what you want to organise, or only know that something feels difficult and you do not want to carry it alone. Tell Damien what is happening and together you can work out what may help.

Call 0478 707 314 Email Damien Explore support during dying and death

Telephone enquiries: 10am–3pm Monday–Friday. Email enquiries may be sent at any time. Appointments may be available outside telephone hours by arrangement.